Twobit's Cooking
by dorkyduck
Summary: Twobit is hungry,there is no chocolate cake,what will he do? VERY RANDOM!
1. Chapter 1

I don't own the outsiders or Jello! but I want some Jello!

One day Two-bit was at the Curtis house, and got hungry. He looked in the fridge and there was _no_ chocolate cake.

"Why is there _NO_ chocolate cake?" Two-bit screamed.

"How did we forget to make some?" Sodapop asked himself.

"No matter! I'll make something!" Two-bit said, "It'll be like a cooking show! Call all the boys as my audience Soda!"

When the gang got there, they stood there watching Two-bit prepare to bake. "I need a lovely assistant!" Two-bit started to think of who would do it. "Sodapop, be my lovely assistant!"

"Yes sir!" Sodapop said happily. Sodapop got a big bowl and almost everything in the kitchen. Two-bit started throwing things into the bowl and the gang owed and awed. Ponyboy was recording this on Two-bit's stolen camera.

"Then you add a teaspoon of this smelly stuff!" Two-bit laughed.

An hour later it was green and jiggly. "What should I name this green jiggly stuff?" Two-bit asked the gang.

"Name it Mickey Mouse! Name it after my old horse!" Sodapop screamed.

"Name it 'Tough Like Dally'," Dally said.

"How about 'You're cleaning my kitchen'," Darry said.

"Umm… no to all of you!" Two-bit said, "Maybe stupid Socs!" Everyone laughed.

"Lets see it jiggles, umm… Jello!" Two-bit said happily.

"It's Jello!" Soda yelled.

"Hey Johnny, come taste it!" Two-bit said, "I want you to be the first one to try the Jello!"

"I'm not eating anything you made Two-bit!"

"Come on it won't bite!"

"Fine!" Johnny walked up to where the Jello was and tasted it. "Hey this is good!"

"Then you heard it here! This Jello was approved by Johnny! Well Tune next time for cooking with Two-bit!"


	2. Chapter 2

I DON'T OWN THE OUTSIDERS

"Today on Cooking With Two-bit, we'll make the best breakfast in Tulsa, Oklahoma. You guessed, chocolate cake!" Sodapop said. Two-bit walked into the kitchen.

"Hello I'm Two-bit, and as you know we will be making chocolate cake!" Two-bit said. "All you need is eggs, chocolate, not the real kind of chocolate, like bakers chocolate. You also need milk, flour, salt, sugar, baking Sodapop, and some other stuff I don't know. Fetch the stuff for me Sodapop"

"Yes sir, wait you want to bake me!" Sodapop said scared.

"No I don't. It's powdery stuff! Now fetch me my ingredients!"

"Yes sir!" Sodapop got all of the ingredients including baking soda.

"First we mix all the junk together! Then we put it in the oven for awhile." Two-bit said, "Instead of waiting, I already made one!" The gang thought it looked marvelous.

"I need a volunteer to taste it." Two-bit said. Everybody raised there hands, "Who to pick? Ah I know! Steve Randle come try a piece of cake!"

"O.K." Steve said, He walked up by Two-bit and the cake.

"Here you go buddy." Two-bit handed him a piece of cake.

"Thanks Two-bit, it's good!" Steve said.

"I'm glad you feel that way Steve!" Two-bit said.

"Why?"

"This is why!" Two-bit threw the whole cake in Steve's face.

"Two-bit, you're going to get it!" Steve yelled.

"Well that's all the time we have for today! I got to run… out the door! Bye!" Two-bit said and ran out the door with Steve chasing him.

"Wait Two-bit," Darry screamed out the door, "You have to clean my kitchen!"

"Do you really expect him to clean the kitchen Darry?" Soda asked.

"No, I expect the lovely assistant to do it! So get to work!"

"Ah man!" Soda groaned, "why do I always have to clean up? Well does anyone want to help?"

"I've got to go to work," Darry said.

"I've got to go home," Johnny said.

"You're home, Johnny?" Sodapop asked.

"He's going to the Dingo with me and Dally," Ponyboy said.

"Just be home right after the movie," Sodapop said.

"Is Darry still home," Ponyboy asked.

"No, why?"

"Then come to the Dingo with us."

"O.K., We'll make Two-bit clean up the mess."


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own the outsiders or Oprah

"Welcome to another episode of: Cooking with Two-bit! I'm the lovely assistant Sodapop! And here is the man of the hour, Two-bit!" Two-bit walked into the kitchen as the gang cheered.

"Hello Tulsa! I'm Two-bit. This is my lovely assistant Sodapop Curtis!"

"Hey what about me?" Ponyboy yelled from behind the camera.

"And our cameraman is Ponyboy Curtis," Two-bit said.

"Thank you."

"Today we will be making" Two-bit said completely ignoring Ponyboy. "Apple pie!" Everyone gasped.

"Isn't that a little hard for you?" Sodapop asked.

"Nothing's to hard for me, I'm the average Soc!" Two-bit laughed.

"Okay sir, try it out!"

"Today we will need: apples, flour, sugar, and umm…and…well you know!" Two-bit said, "Sodapop, fetch me everything I need!"

"Yes sir!" Sodapop ran around the kitchen looking for everything he needed.

"Okay, first you mix up all of the dry stuff in this bowl," Two-bit said. "Then you mix up all of the wet stuff into the smaller bowl. And now we put the dry stuff and the wet stuff mix. Then you mix it all together. Then put it on the table and kneed it. Sodapop!"

"Yes sir!"

"Kneed the dough!" Two-bit said

"Yes sir!" Sodapop started to kneed the dough.

"After its kneeded put the apples and stuff into the new crust" Two-bit said. "Then bake it!"

"But that will take to long!" Johnny whined.

"Yes it will Johnny, that's why I made enough pies for everyone!" Everyone cheered.

"I love apple pie!" Steve yelled. He then began to run and jump on the couch.

"It's not Oprah Steve." Two-bit said.

"What's Oprah?" Steve asked.

"You'll find out soon enough Steve."


	4. Chapter 4

Hey! I haven't touched this story in a while. I don't own The Outsiders, The Hitcher, Dirty Dancing or Tommyboy.

Warning: This is really random. The idea of what he cooks was not my idea…ENJOY!

"Hey it's me, chef Two-bit! Where is my lovely assistant?" Two-bit called. "Lovely assistant? Lovely assistant!" Soda finally popped up from under the table.

"Hey Two-bit! I have my own lovely assistant! Her name's Emily!" Just then a girl who seemed to be 5'6" popped up from under the couch. Yes couch. She had blue eyes and blonde hair that went to her shoulders. "Emily this is my buddy Two-bit."

"Hi! I'm Emily!"

"Great, Mr.Perky has a spaz assistant. I want another assistant." Two-bit complained.

"Hey! I'm not a spaz! I know the perfect assistant for you." Emily said.

"Really? Who?" Two-bit asked.

"Her name is Caryn." Another girl popped up. Not from the couch, or under the table, this time she just ran in through the door.

"Hi, I'm Caryn." This door girl said. She, like Emily, had blonde hair, but hers was darker. She was short. About 5 foot nothing. She had brown eyes.

"Hey, I'm Two-bit. Now let's start the show!" A big smoke filled the hair. Five more greasers filled the room.

"Dally! I told you not to smoke so much!" Darry yelled.

"Dork." Emily and Caryn whispered in unison.

"Hey!" Darry yelled. He seems to yell a lot.

"Back to the show! Today is a special day, I will be making spaghetti. lovely assistant Soda get all the stuff! First here's a word from our sponsors!"

"Um…Two-bit we don't have any sponsors." Caryn said.

"I see." Two-bit ran into the bathroom. Two seconds later, he came back and threw something at Caryn. "Here make a commercial!"

"Hi. Are you…uh…tired of your old, normal hair? Try our new Greaser's Styling Pomade. Slick it back…or…slick it back! So buy some today." Caryn said. "How was that?"

"It'll do." Two-bit replied. "Welcome back! Now that everything is set up by the lovely assistant Soda, let's begin."

"Hey Two-bit can my lovely assistant and I watch today?" Soda asked.

"Just this once I suppose. My new lovely assistant will help today. O.K, first we put water into a pan with the spaghetti. Then you boil it, Caryn boil it." Two-bit said as Caryn did this.

"Then you...then you, Caryn do you now what to do?" Two-bit asked after it was boiled.

"No…"

"Crap."

"You just-" Darry started.

"Darry, this is for chefs and their lovely assistants." Two-bit hissed. "We need to think about this."

"Um…no, that's not it." Caryn said.

Five hours later, Caryn and Two-bit were still thinking about it.

"Whatever! I was trying to show you how it was made! You all know how to make it so this is what it looks like when it's done." Two-bit said taking out a plate of spaghetti.

"Hey Two-bit, you know we have a box that has the steps on it right?" Pony asked.

"No Pony, I didn't but I'll tell you one thing. Never pick up a stranger."

"I don't get it."

"Fine! Be that way!"

"Are you O.K.?" Darry asked.

"No! Just go and have the time of your life!"

"Two-bit calm down!"

"Soda go hang out with Tommy boy!"

"While he's doing that," Emily said, "Tune in for another Episode of,"

"Cooking With Two-bit!" Caryn finished.

A/N: RR: RANDOM REVIEWS PEOPLE!


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